As we all know, job interviews can be made or broken on any deceivingly unimportant gesture.
America, founded in 1776 (although not officially recognized by the international community until, at earliest, 1781), has long promised a brighter tomorrow, but rarely has delivered on anything resembling such a thing. (Except for a brief moment in August 1962: for about 20 minutes, the United States had achieved about 84% of what its founders intended. It was the closest we’ve ever come to making good on our potential. Little known fact.) A bunch of other stuff happened throughout our nation’s history — the contested election of 1825, Mark Twain’s volume of masterpieces, Prince making a guitar entirely out of frogs — but none have been quite as deliciously splendid as the blog for which I’m writing an introduction right now. World leaders are currently having a summit behind closed doors to figure out what to do about this. There will be punches thrown and regrettably specific racial slurs tossed about. But they will reach no conclusion. No antidote will be commissioned. Any attempts to eradicate this blog will be in vain.
The Scalawag: Catch Our Fever™!